He Knows!

Often times I think I know exactly what I need.  Often times I think I know exactly how things should happen!  Often times I like to be in control. Often times I like to think that I know what is best.  But often times I am wrong!

A mother of a couple of my teens is going through a really hard time right now.  She just lost somebody really close to her.  As I was talking with her this week I told her to let me know if there was anything that I could do for her or her kids.  She asked me to be praying for her to have strength.

I definitely wanted to honor that request and pray for God to provide her with strength!  She texted me right before I went running, so as I was running she was heavy on my heart and in my prayers.  While I run my mind wanders.  I have music playing but I rarely listen to the songs.  A couple of weeks ago it took me two miles before I realized that I had been listening to the same song on repeat the whole time.  So as my mind was wandering and as I was praying for my friend God reminded me of something that I often forget!

He Knows!  As I prayed for God to fill her with strength He reminded me that He knows what she truly needs.  She may need strength or she may need peace or she may need support.  He knows!  Whatever it is that she truly needs He knows!  And He gives us what He Knows we need.

This whole conversation came up again only about an hour after that with my sister-in-law Erin.  My brother and sister-in-law have been planning on leaving for El Salvador in less than a month to serve with the Peace Corps for 27 months.  Last Friday was Erin's last day as a 6th grade science teacher.  She said goodbye to her students and gave up her job that she loved knowing that she was going to be moving to El Salvador in just a few weeks.  That same day Braden and Erin found out that the Peace Corps had cancelled their assignment in El Salvador because of safety concerns.  All the plans that Braden and Erin had been making for the past few months just got chunked out the window.  I can only imagine how overwhelming of a day that had to be.

As I talked with Erin on the phone yesterday because it was her birthday she said, "God is teaching me patience.  Your brother has plenty of it, but God is teaching me to be patient."  I told her that I completely understand!  There have been times in my life when I thought I knew exactly how things ought to go and what I needed and my frustration with God grew as He wasn't giving me exactly what I thought was best.  I didn't understand why He wasn't doing something.  Little did I know He was doing a whole lot of something!

The funny thing about that is at the end God always gives me something better than what I thought I really needed.  He knows better than I do exactly what I need.  I trust that He knows better than Braden and Erin exactly what they need as well.  It's not that He doesn't have the power to give us exactly what we want,  it's that He loves us so much that He doesn't want to give us anything less than the best!  I trust that my God knows what we need better than we do.

My prayers often focus on things that I think I need.  But I find so much comfort in knowing that I serve a God whose power is limitless and knows me so much better than I could ever know myself.  He knows my past, my present, and my future.  There is no one more qualified in knowing my needs than my Creator Himself!  May we remember that He knows our needs and that He is the God who provides!  May we remember that His desire is for us to desire Him!  He is God!  He is Good!  He Knows!!!

That's how Rumors get Started!

"For we have heard how the Lord made a dry path for you through the Red Sea when you left Egypt...For the Lord YOUR God is the supreme God of the heavens above and the earth below."-Rahab

Joshua 2:10-11

Rahab had heard what God had done!  Everyone had heard what God had done!  People couldn't stop talking about all that God had done for His people.  The news of what THEIR God the supreme God had done was spreading!  

Iv'e never seen my God part the Red Sea for me to walk across on a dry path, but I have seen Him do so many other amazing things.  I have seen Him answer prayers.  I have seen Him provide.  I have seen Him deliver!  I have experienced His faithfulness.  People need to know that my God He is the supreme God of the heavens above and the earth below and that He is their God as well!

What have people heard from you about our God?  Have they heard what He has done for you?  Have they heard how He has rescued you?  Do you know what He has done for you?  Can people look at your life and know that the Lord YOUR God is the supreme God of the heavens above and the earth below?

Tell somebody this Christmas what your God the supreme God of the heavens above and the earth below has done for you!

What are you Looking At?

What are you looking at?  Right now I'm sitting in Starbucks looking at my large over priced coffee and reading through the book of Hebrews.  It's only natural to look at what is in front of you.  It's hard for me to look at or even imagine something that hasn't happened yet.

Spiritually what are you looking at today?  Are you caught up in what you don't have or are you praising Jesus for what you do have?  Are you seeking comfort here on earth or are you storing up far greater treasures in heaven?

As I read through Hebrews 11 verse 26 stood out to me.  The author is writing about Moses and he says,

"He thought it was better to suffer for the sake of Christ than to own the treasures of Egypt, for he was LOOKING AHEAD to his great reward.  It was by faith that Moses left the land of Egypt, not fearing the King's anger.  He kept right on going because he kept his eyes on the one who is invisible."

 Hebrews 11:26-27

Moses knew that he had a great earthly reward if he stayed in Egypt, but obviously Moses knew that that earthly reward could never compare to the reward God had in store for him.  Moses gave up a reward from the richest kingdom on earth because he knew God had something greater in store for him.  Are we willing to give up our earthly rewards in order to pursue Him at ALL cost?  Do we even realize that our reward in heaven is greater than all the riches of Egypt?

I LOVE the last part of verse 27...He kept right on going because he kept his eyes on the one who is invisible.  That almost seems impossible.  How do you keep your eyes on something that is invisible?  As you seek Him you see Him.  Although our God may be physically invisible His works are not.  As Moses kept his eyes on our invisible God he saw His very visible works!  The 10 plagues, the parting of the red sea, the cloud by day and the fire by night, the manna from heaven, somehow our invisible God has a very visible presence!  His works are very visible to those who are seeking the invisible!

I believe the same is true today!  As we seek the invisible God we see His visible works!  We see Him answer prayers, we see Him heal, we see Him provide!  May we learn to be like Moses and look ahead to our great reward and may we keep on going even when times are scary and hard because our eyes are fixed on the one who is invisible!

I Just Want a Clean Kitchen

As a child I was probably one of the most unorganized people who has ever walked this planet!  I never made my bed.  I never put up my laundry.  I just stuffed everything into my backpack and hoped that it would all work out when I got to school.  As a teenager most arguments between my mom and myself stemmed from the fact that you couldn’t even see the floor of my bedroom.  For some reason she thought that was unacceptable?!?  But then something weird happened!

I went off to college and I became a gazillion times more organized.  I think it all changed when I realized that I didn’t like it when my roommate’s stuff was all over the place so I better make sure that mine was all picked up!  Once I moved out of the dorms and into the apartments and had a kitchen that became a huge deal as well.  If there is one thing that I really don’t like it’s a dirty kitchen!!!  I began to make my bed every single day and make sure all of my clothes got hung up and that they were all hanging in color order and organized by season.  Organization became key!

I am still like that today for the most part!  Each morning I roll out of bed and the first thing I do is make the bed!  There is just something about a room with a bed that is made that makes it look so much more put together!  I try to keep the closet organized and never let the dishes pile up in the sink.  I like having a clean place!  I like having everything all put together!  I like organization! But…

Sometimes life gets a little crazy.  I told some of my kids the other day, “You can always tell how crazy my life is by how color coordinated my closet is.”  Well right now my clean clothes are sprawled out all over the floor.  They haven’t even made it to the closet! I have returned to my high school days.  If my mother were here she would have a fit because you can barely see the floor of my room!  Life is crazy right now!

I don’t mean crazy in a bad way!  I mean crazy in a way where I am watching God involve me in so many incredible things and I am spinning around like crazy!  He’s constantly filling my cup and pouring me out!  These next few weeks are non-stop crazy!  I look at my calendar and I see a breakfast with a different teen everyday of the week!  I look at my calendar and I see a different teen to be picked up from school each day!  I look at my calendar and I see endless opportunities to grow with my sisters in Christ.  I look at my calendar and from the outside it would look packed.  And it is!  But it works!

It works because I make sure that there is time in each and every day to sit and be still with my God.  To be honest there have been plenty of times where I have been in my apartment and could have hung all of those clean clothes up on hangers, but that would have come at the expense of losing that time alone focused on my Savior and His Word.  He is so much more valuable to me than a neatly organized closet!

So as the craziness of the Christmas season keeps us all spinning, may we never forget to focus on our Savior!  May we realize that time with Him is so much better than having a clean kitchen, a made bed, and an organized closet!  He has so much in store for us!  He is so real and powerful!  We must focus on Him!  May your time with Him be more valuable than a clean kitchen or an organized closet!  He is perfect and so good!  

The Joys of my Job

Blessed!  If there was one word I had to use to describe how I feel right now that would be it!  Blessed!

God is so good!  His faithfulness is amazing.  I love seeing and experiencing all that He is doing in my life, but a close second is seeing everything that He is doing in my girls' lives!

He is amazing!  I love watching their faith in Him grow!  Most of my girls know that anytime they get in my car for me to take them home that before they get out of my car we are going to pray.  I love spending time in prayer with my girls!  It's one of my most favorite things ever.  In the past I've always had to ask them, "Hey, before you get out of the car can we pray?"  But this week things have changed.  I took one of my girls home on Tuesday after spending the afternoon at my apartment and as we pulled up to her place she looks at me and says, "Hey, are we going to pray?"

I'm pretty sure my face must have lit up right away!  She had been looking forward to us praying together! My hope is that prayer doesn't just become something they do with me whenever we hang out, but that they make prayer part of everything they do!  As if once this week wasn't enough, last night one of my girls spent the night with me.  We had stayed up late talking and crying and laughing, and we were emotionally exhausted. As we crawled into bed she looked at me and said, "Can we pray together before we go to sleep?"

How else can you answer a question like that other than, "OF COURSE!"  They are falling in love with their Savior and it fills my heart with so much joy!  He is so good to us!  I pray that they will continue to taste and see that the Lord is good!  Little things like this remind me of why I have the best job ever!  I am doing what God has called me to do and it is a joy to be a part of His story!

How They Loved Me!

I’ve mentioned over and over again how blessed I was as a child and even am now as an “adult” to have the most amazing parents!  I know that there has not been a single day since I was formed in my mother’s womb that I have not been prayed for. I have never had doubts of their love for me!

Sometimes I wonder why God has blessed me so much.  Why did God give me two parents that love me unconditionally when some people don’t even get one?  Why do I have two parents with great jobs that can provide for me when some people don’t have money to put food on the table?  Why did I get two parents who love the Lord with all of their hearts when a lot of kids never have that example?  Why me?  God why have you been so good to me?

Sometimes I almost feel kind of guilty about it.  But then I remember that they are amazing gifts from God.  They have taught me what it looks like to pour out unconditional love.  Lets be honest, if their love was conditional there were plenty of moments throughout my childhood where I would have been in a pretty bad condition, but there love for me was always present no matter the circumstance.  I am so thankful for that!  They taught me how to love people by how they loved me and my siblings!

The ways they showed us their love are countless.  I can’t count the number of hugs and kisses I have received from my parents over the past 23 years.  There has never been a day that I have walked out of my house with my mom present without her saying, “I love you.  Be careful!”  My parents spent almost 20 years in the gym watching me play basketball.  Nothing says love like watching girls basketball!  My dad would spend hours with me at the gym rebounding for me!  My parents gave up time, sleep, and so much more to show me their love.

Tonight a dear friend pointed out to me a glimpse of maybe why I was blessed with such amazing parents.   She told me, “Maybe He gave you all of that so that He could prepare you to love others the way they loved you.”  And that clicked!  That seems like that should have been something so easy for me to see.   All along He has been teaching me how to love unconditionally.  He has been teaching me how to love my girls even when sometimes it costs me a little sleep.  He has been teaching me how to love my girls through hours of bleacher booty watching girls basketball.  He has been teaching me how to love my girls when they come to me with their pain and mistakes.  He has been teaching me how to love my girls even when they try to push me away!  He gave me two incredible parents who continually pour out their love on me so that I could learn how to pour out that love on others!

He is so good and His ways are so much greater than anything I could ever imagine.  He prepares us for what He calls us to.  His faithfulness endures forever.  His presence is inescapable.  He is God and He is good!    

The Darkest Valley

Last night before I crawled into bed I got to spend some time with my Holy God in prayer!  As I lied there with my face on the carpet my God brought to mind one of my most favorite Psalms!  If you grew up at Memorial Road you probably know this one by heart thanks to Mrs. McBride!

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.  He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He refreshes my soul.  He guides me along the right paths for His name's sake. Psalm 23:1-3

As these verses that have been engraved on my heart came into my thoughts I couldn't help but think...This is where I am at right now!  I am lying in green pastures beside still waters!  I am so thankful for that.  Praise God for the rest, peace, and strength that He is allowing me to receive right now!

But as I began to think about the following verses my prayer became something that I can pray only because of Him being alive in me.  It is against every instinct that I have, but I truly believe that sometimes it is what is best.  I love where I am at right now!  I love the time of rest and peace that I am enjoying in the green pastures, but this isn't the place that I am meant to permanently live.  My desire above anything and everything else in this world is to know my God more fully!  I want to learn to cling to Him above all!  So my prayer is that if these green pastures become a place where my growth stops that my savior will lead me through the darkest valley.  I know that the valley of the shadow of death is where I learn to cling more and more to my God.  I know that the valley of the shadow of death is not fun, but that it is a place of growth.  I know that the darkest valley is a place where I must depend on Him to guide me through when I can't see.

Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.  You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.  You anoint my head with oil, my cup overflows.  Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.  Psalm 23:4-6

May I trust my God so much that I can pray that in His timing I will leave the green pastures and go with Him into the darkest valley.  God if it takes going through the valley of the shadow of death to grow in my faith and dependence on you then I am willing to go there.  I trust in You!  I know that you will be there close beside me!  That is what I want more than safety, more than comfort, more than family!  I want You! I want to live fully dependent on you!  I want to dwell in your house forever!

Fall on Your Face

I have come to realize that there is this amazing thing that happens when we remove ourselves from what makes us comfortable.  It seems as when our comforts slip away we find ourselves closer to our God.  Think about the times that you have felt closest to God.  When I examine my list each time has something in common, it's missing my "comforts."

There are a few specific examples that I can think of!  Honduras is a place like that for me  One night while I was brushing my teeth with bottled water I felt something on my leg and looked down to see a giant roach about mid calf.  GROSS!!!  I would have screamed but Amber was already sleeping and I didn't want to wake her.  I didn't quite have the comforts there that I am used to here in the States, but that place always makes me more aware of my God and draws me closer to His heart.  Comforts don't equal happiness!

Fasting is another one of those moments where comfort is removed but closeness to God is undeniable!  He has this way of filling the space of things we give up!  When will we realize that He is more than enough?

This last one is so simple but so powerful to me!  It has to be one of my most favorite things!  Giving up the comforts of a chair!  Sounds silly right?  But there is something so right and humbling about being face down on the ground crying out to God in prayer.  Nothing draws my heart closer to Him than falling on my face in prayer.  There is nothing wrong with praying sitting in a chair or a pew, but personally face down on the ground is where I feel closest to my savior!  I read through the Bible and time and time again I see examples of believers falling on their faces or falling to their knees in praise and prayer!

Something about being on your knees just feels right.  It's a gentle reminder to me that I am approaching the King!  It's a gentle reminder that He is all powerful and I am His servant.  It's a gentle reminder that He is God and I am not!  And even though the rough carpet isn't exactly what I would call comfortable it is there in that place that I am overcome with joy and love for my God and all that He has done for me!

It's amazing to me how much easier it is to hear His voice when I take time to fall before His throne.  It's amazing how much easier it is to open my heart to Him when I go to the place I am supposed to be!  I am reminded that there would never have been any way for me to save myself.  He did so much for me, and I should be falling before Him daily to thank Him! He alone is God!  He is so good!

What changed?

I love reading about Peter.  Besides Moses and of course Jesus, I think Peter has to be one of my absolute favorite men ever.  He was always so quick to open his mouth.  Sometimes that got him in a little bit of trouble.  Fear tended to cripple him.  When he stepped out of the boat to walk to Jesus on the water he allowed fear to slip in and began to sink.  When he was following Jesus as they took him away for trial He denied that he even knew Him three times.

He denied Jesus three times!  Just hours earlier he told Jesus to His face I will never deny you.  Peter had no idea that things were about to get scary.  Up until this point following Jesus had meant leaving family, giving up their jobs, and probably a bunch of funny looks; but the risks were about to go way up.  Jesus tried to explain to His apostles time and time again that the time was coming for Him to be crucified, but they just didn't get it.  They didn't realize just how messy things were about to get.

When things got scary and Peter started to realize that they were going to crucify His Jesus he began to get a little bit confused.  None of this matched what his view of the Messiah was.  When asked if he was one that had been with Jesus, He denied Him three times.  Fear slipped in and faith slipped out.

Can you imagine the guilt and shame that Peter felt knowing that he had denied Jesus.  I can only imagine the feeling Peter must have had in his stomach when he heard the rooster crow and saw the face of his Jesus.  The very man that He loved.  The man that had shown him so much.  His Jesus.  He had denied Jesus.  The man that had turned his life upside down.

But something changed.  When we skip forward to Acts Peter arises as the early leader of the church.  He speaks God's word boldly and fearlessly.  In Acts 4 Peter and John are standing before the council after getting in trouble for preaching about Jesus.  Acts 4:19-20 says, "But Peter and John replied, "Do you think God wants us to obey you rather than Him?  We cannot stop telling about everything we have seen and heard."  Their lives are on the line here.  They could whipped, thrown into jail, or even killed; but they have no fear.  They can't stop speaking about what they have seen and heard.

What changed?  Why did our fearful Peter who denied Jesus three times have such a change of heart?  What was it that he had seen and heard that completely changed his life?

He saw His savior Jesus raised from the dead.  The resurrection changes EVERYTHING!  If my Savior Jesus was still in the grave then He would just be another great guy.  He would just be another prophet who did great things.  But He is so much more than that.  He did something that only He could do.

So often I think we down play the impressiveness of Jesus raising from the dead.  We have heard about His resurrection since we were little.  Do we truly grasp how amazing it is for someone who was dead to come back to life?  He wasn't just unconscious.  He wasn't just sleeping.  He was dead, and now He is alive!  Peter knew He was dead and then He saw Him alive and that was something that He couldn't stop talking about.  There was no way to shut him up.  The only way to keep Peter from talking about what he had seen and heard was to kill him.  He wasn't going to make the same mistake he made before the crucifixion of denying Jesus again.

Peter knew what he had seen and what he had heard and it changed his life.  He was not going to shut up.  He had seen His Jesus raised from the grave.  I have to think Peter had to be the most excited about seeing Jesus alive after His last encounter with Him before His death.  To receive forgiveness and grace from His Jesus after denying Him three times must have been a sigh of relief.  Peter wanted everyone to know about his risen Lord.

So my question to us today is, "What have we seen and what have we heard?"  Have you encountered Jesus in a way that has changed your life?  Have you encountered Him in a way that drives away fear?  Have you encountered Him in a way that makes it so that you can't stop talking about Him?  Have you encountered Him in a way that says, "I don't care what man thinks, I am here to please my God"?

Has He changed your life?  His resurrection changes EVERYTHING!  Tell somebody about it!  

I Just Can't Get Over It!

You know you are starting to get old when your alarm goes off around 5:30 almost every morning because you have to be somewhere by 6:00.  I've given up on morning showers and makeup isn't always essential.  My body says, "If the sun isn't up, then I shouldn't be either."  But I have come to LOVE the stillness of the mornings.  After I hit my snooze a few times and I finally get my feet to hit the ground I'm reminded of His grace.  His grace so powerful that it draws me into Him.  His grace so beautiful that it outshines this world.  His grace so deep that keeps me from sinking.  His grace so strong that satan has no power over it.  His grace so good that it fills me with so much joy.

Every Tuesday morning, I am blessed to get to study the Word with a small group of women from my church.  I LOVE this time together with them every Tuesday.  As we share our stories with each other I am amazed by how each of us has experienced His grace.  His grace so beautiful and deep.    After Bible study I walk to my office and I'm filled with so much joy that I just want to skip up and down the halls.  I can't get this huge smile off of my face!  The power of His grace fills me with so much joy, and I just can't get over it.  He has done so much in my life and I want to tell the world about it.  The King has invited me to have a role in His eternal story.  I get to be a part of the best story ever told.  I just can't get over that.  He chose me!  He chose you!  We get to be a part of His story.  He doesn't need me, but He invites me to be a part of His story.  I'm so amazed.  Thank You Lord!

I pray that I will never seek to play a role different than the one He has called me to.  It's not my job to be the star of this Story.  My Jesus is the star.  This story is about Him, but it's so amazing that He chose me to play a part.  He chose me, and He chose you.  Now we have a choice too.  Are we going to choose to accept the role that our God has given us, or are we going to refuse it because we want to be the star or because it's not the role we really wanted to play?  He knows me best.  He knows my skills.  He knows my abilities.  There is no one better to cast my role than the one who created me and who writes the Story.  May I fill my role to the best of my ability for the glory of His name.

I'm amazed by my God.  He is perfect in EVERY way.  I don't understand everything that happens, but I know and trust that He is in control.  That He is working out everything in His story for the glory of His name and the growth of the Kingdom.  The way He does this amazes me.  I can't get over what He has done and continues to do for me!  May the name of the Lord be praised.  He is God!  He is good!  He is faithful!  He is love!  He is perfect!

How do we Thank Jesus?

This past week I made the trek back to Oklahoma City to spend Thanksgiving with my wonderful family.  It was such a blessing to be with them again.  These past 3 months away from them have been a challenge. They truly are some of the most amazing loving people you will ever meet.  As I was getting ready to go to bed on Wednesday night I stopped to spend some time in the Word.  My day had been filled with so many blessings from my awesome God and I couldn't wait to dive into His Word.

I have recently been reading through the Gospels trying to really focus on Jesus' words and what He said to those who were following Him.  Wednesday night I found myself in the middle of Luke 17.  It couldn't have been a more perfect chapter to reflect on with Thanksgiving being the following day.  As I read through the story of Jesus healing the ten lepers I was reminded of the one who ran back to Jesus to give Him thanks.

"He fell to the ground at Jesus' feet, thanking him for what he had done."  Luke 17:16

As I read that line it penetrated my heart.  He fell to the ground at Jesus' feet to thank Him.  He stopped what He was doing to run back to Jesus and thank Him.  How do I thank Jesus for all that He has done for me?  My Jesus has healed me of so many things.  He has given me so many things.  He continually blesses me.  But how do I thank Him?

So often I forget that I don't deserve any of the blessings that I have.  I don't deserve heaven.  I don't deserve to have a relationship with God.  I don't deserve forgiveness of my sins.  I don't deserve grace.  But for some reason my God who is rich in mercy and love pours all of these things out on me.  So often we think we are entitled to all of these things.  With our attitudes of entitlement come lives without gratitude.  We forget to fall to the ground before our sweet Savior and thank Him for what He has done.

May we remember that what we truly deserve is death, but because of our God's love for us we have the hope of eternal life.  May we never feel so entitled to blessings that we lose an attitude of gratitude. May we realize all that our God has blessed us with and all that He has done for us and fall before Him.  He has done for us what we could never do for ourselves!  Praise God for He is good!  His faithfulness towards us is amazing.  Thank you Jesus!

Listen to My Heart

Listen to our hearts.  

Hear our spirits sing.  

A song of praise that flows, from those you have redeemed.  

We will use the words we know to tell you what an awesome God you are.  

But words are not enough to tell you of our love.  

So listen to our hearts.

Last Wednesday night in the teen room we were talking about worship.  To close off the evening this was one of the final songs that we sang.  The “time of worship” during PV&J that night didn’t exactly run smoothly.  The projectors were not lined up, the Scriptures were cut off on the right side of the screen, and the final video didn’t play.  The distractions seemed to be limitless.  Satan is tricky like that.

As the night came to a close and we sang this song, God humbled me greatly.  I had gotten so caught up in how wrong things had gone and the “performance” that I had lost sight of why we were all truly there.  WORSHIP!  My lips were singing praises to my God, but my heart was singing complaints and worries.  As I sang (off key as always) and asked God to listen to my heart He made it ever so clear to me that my heart was not singing praises to His name.  It was like He said to me…”okay I’m listening to your heart and your heart says….I’m stressed.  I’m frustrated.  I’m distracted.  I’m trying to please people.”

I was proclaiming one thing with my mouth and a completely different thing with my heart.  My mouth was saying God I don’t have words to tell you how wonderful you are so please listen to my heart.  But my heart was far from that.  I would have really preferred Him not to listen to my heart at that point in the evening because my heart was self-centered.  I had lost focus of why I was there. I’m thankful for His gentle nudge that drew me back into focus. 

My God reminds me time and time again that He doesn’t just want empty words.  He doesn’t just want me to sing on key (I would be in trouble if that was a requirement).  He doesn’t just want me to go through the motions.  That’s not what He cares about.  He isn’t there to see us perform.  He is present in our worship because of our hearts!  He desires to have our hearts close to Him.

I want to be able to ask God to listen to my heart and know that He is going to hear things that honor Him.  I pray that my heart will praise His name at all times.  I pray that when my heart loses focus that His faithful nudge will draw me back to focusing on Him! I pray that the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart will be pleasing in your sight O Lord my God; my redeemer!

We are Christians

Our God is so so good!  I'm am so amazed at how He reveals Himself to me daily in new and different ways!  He is the Creator.  He always has something new up His sleeve for me to see!  I'm so thankful to serve a God like that!

Today after my run I decided I was going to go to the gym at my apartment complex to lift weights.  I was 1 of 3 people in the gym.  The other two people there were a married couple.  The girl happened to be wearing a shirt that said PEACE, LOVE, UCO!  UCO happens to be a college in Edmond, the town where I grew up.  As I was leaving the gym I walked right past the two of them and just casually said, "Did you go to the University of Central Oklahoma?"  She said, "Yes."  We then preceded to have a conversation about Edmond.  I told them that I had grown up there and that I moved here just about a year and a half ago to work at a church here in Little Rock.

After realizing that we were all Christians we started talking about our passions and different things that we have been involved with at different churches.  They have been looking for a church here in Little Rock to plug into since they just moved here.  I told them about how our church goes down under the Broadway bridge once a month to feed the homeless and they instantly asked if they could join us!  They were so excited!

As I was getting ready to leave Evelyn gave me her number and told me to text her.  Usually I don't exchange numbers with people I have only known for 2 minutes but as she read off her number to me she said, "We are Christians too."  That's such a simple little phrase, but the meaning of it was so strong to me.  The unification that we have in Christ is so amazing.  We are Christians!  We are a family!  It's amazing how He can bond 3 people in such a short amount of time.

There are lots of things that I don't have in common with this great couple that I just met, but one thing is for sure...I have the most important thing in common with them!  We are bonded in Christ!

He is Faithful!

If you asked me my favorite quality about God I would probably say His faithfulness.  I am always amazed at how He is so so faithful to me!

I have grown up in a family that has been overflowing with love for one another and I know that my parents would do absolutely anything for me.  They have been so faithful to take care of me and show me love, but their faithfulness towards me can't even begin to compare with the faithfulness my God shows me time and time again.  He amazes me!

This week at work was a little challenging.  I was struggling with really seeing my purpose and dealing with some of the challenges that come from being the only full time girl on staff and being the only person under 30.  Sometimes I feel a little out of place.

But God knows my thoughts and has a way of showing me and reminding me of His perfect plan.  He has a way of reassuring me of His purpose and reminding me that in all reality He doesn't need me.  He reminds me that I am here because He loves me!  And because He loves me He has invited me to be a part of His story!

This week was full of unexpected texts, facebook messages, and cards from people I haven't talked to in months just asking how they could be praying for me.  I received two messages from two different friends just saying that God had put me on their hearts and they wanted me to know that they love me and were praying for me this week.  Two girls I rarely talk to!  God had placed me on their hearts because He knew that I needed just a small word of encouragement.

Those words they sent me were so much more than just a small pick me up.  They were reminders of God's faithfulness to little-ole-me They were reminders of His love and His provision.  They were a beautiful blessing.

As I spend time with my girls laughing and sharing what God has done in our lives He reminds me of my purpose.  He reminds me that there is no greater joy than to see that "my children" are walking in the truth.  He reminds me of His faithfulness and I am reminded of how He deserves my FULL trust.

His faithfulness to me is amazing.  I am one of billions of people on this earth, but He loves ME so much that He would arrange for me to be encouraged by two other sisters.  ME!  He did that for me.  I don't get it.  His love is perfect and He chooses to lavish it upon me!  He is so much greater than a little blog could ever explain.  Praise be to God our creator.  His faithfulness is amazing!

You will show us your faithfulness and unfailing love as you promised to our ancestors Abraham and Jacob long ago!    Micah 7:20

What does Satan Have to Say About You?

I try not to worry too much about what other people think of me.  I don't want people not to like me, and I don't want to have people upset with me, but sometimes it happens.  I don't like it when people don't like me, but there is one person who I really want to hate me!  Satan.  I want to be the kind of girl that when I wake up every morning Satan gets nervous.  I want him to think, O no here she comes!

I want to live my life in a way that satan sees me as a threat.  I want to live my life sold out for the Kingdom of God!  I want to fight against satan with every breath that I take.  I want him to have horrible things to say about me.

My fear is that sometimes all he can say about me is, "o yea, Barrie Jo she's a nice girl, but she doesn't cause me any trouble."  If that is all he has to say about me then something is really wrong.  I want to be a threat to satan.  I want to be worth his time.  When I look back over the past few years and think about the times Satan has attacked me the most it has been the times I have been trying to give my most to the Kingdom of God!

I know that my God is real!  I know that He has power far greater than I could ever imagine.  I know that He is omnipresent.  I know that He wins!  But I also know, satan is real.  He has come to kill, steal, and destroy.  One thing I think we often forget about satan though is that he is not omnipresent.  He can't be everywhere at once like my amazing God!  Satan has to pick his targets.

I have trouble believing that satan would waste his time attacking those who aren't a threat to him.
I don't want to live my life in a way where satan looks at me and says, "I don't need to mess with her.  She's not doing anything for God's kingdom.  She's not worth my time."  I want to live my life sold out for the Kingdom of God.

Being a nice girl isn't going to cut it.  So often we get confused.  We think being a Christian is about not doing bad things.  I know lots of people who don't do bad things and are nice people, who don't believe in God.  It's so much more than that.  It's about serving the Kingdom at all times.  It's about making disciples.  It's about falling in love with God more and more each and every day.  It's about feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, visiting the sick, and showing justice.  Satan isn't threatened by "nice people."

So my question to all of us is, Are you worth Satan's time?  What does he have to say about you? Does he even notice you?

I pray that my life will be so submitted to God that I will allow Him to use me to turn this world upside down for Him.  I pray that Satan will have no doubts whose side I am fighting on.  I pray that satan will have nothing good to say about me.  I pray that he will see me as a threat.

I know that when he attacks that my God will be by my side giving me strength.  I know that the attacks can hurt, but that they can also bring more glory to my God!  I have to remember, I know how the story ends!  My God WINS!  

Do Not Fear

Over and over again throughout the Word God tells us, Do not fear.  I am with you!  Don’t be afraid.  Trust in me!  Do not worry!  I will take care of you.  We read these words over and over and over again, yet we fail to let them penetrate our hearts.  So many times we are crippled by our fears and worries.  We forget that the creator of the universe is in control and that He is deserving of our complete trust.

Growing up I would worry about typical things; grades, friends, sports, and random other things that used to seem like a really big deal to me.  In college my worry turned more towards figuring out what I was going to do with my life after graduation.  I remember my sophomore year of college after returning from my semester in Honduras being panicked.  For the past 10 years I had been planning on moving to Honduras after graduation and being a missionary, but now I knew that wasn’t what I needed to do.  God had shown me that that wasn’t His plan, but He hadn’t yet shown me what His plan was.  I remember being so stressed, worried, and afraid.  He was teaching me a very valuable lesson…Trust!  Trust in Him! 

One night as I was stressing about trying to plan out my life God spoke to my heart in a very clear way.  He reminded me so clearly, “I have never let you take a breath alone, and I promise I never will.”  That simple reminder of His presence has calmed my heart in amazing ways.  I wish I could say that I never worry, but that is not the case.  There are still times when I forget that the creator of the universe is in complete control and I allow worry to slip in. 

God often reminds me that my worrying gets me nowhere.  One day I was sitting on a plane and my flight was delayed.  Because I have always lived in small cities like Little Rock and Oklahoma City with small airports I have found that there is no such thing as a direct flight!  My first flight was delayed and I started worrying that I wasn’t going to make my connection.  I sat there in my seat anxious about making my connection and then realized this isn’t doing me any good.  My worry wasn’t going to make my plane get there any faster.  My worry wasn’t going to guarantee that I would make my connection.  All my worry was going to do was get me wound up over something I couldn’t control.  So often we get wound up and anxious over things we can't do anything about.  Our worry doesn’t change anything!

Whenever I start to feel anxious or afraid I must remember that nothing will ever happen to me that doesn’t first pass through the hands of my God.  That doesn’t mean that everything is always going to be easy and great, but I know that my God will never give me more than I can handle.  I know that my God’s love for me surpasses anything I could ever imagine.  I know that my God is working things out for my good since I love Him.  I know that He is worthy of my trust.  So I have no reason or excuse to worry about anything.

When I worry I am pretty much telling God, “I don’t trust you.”  Francis Chan puts it this way in his book Crazy Love, “Worry implies that we don’t quite trust that God is big enough, powerful enough, or loving enough to take care of what’s happening in our lives.”  That is not the message that I want to be communicating to my God.

When I look back over my short 23 years of life that I have had on this earth so far, I can’t think of one moment of worry that has gotten me anywhere or that has changed anything.  Sometimes the things I have worried about have actually happened, more often than not they haven’t.  Even in the hard times when the things I have worried about have gone “wrong” my God has shown His faithfulness to me.

One of my favorite verses is Philippians 4:6-7

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about EVERYTHING.  Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.  Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.  His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

This verse reminds me that when I start to worry I need to start to pray.  God knows what we need!  He knows what we need far more than we know what we need.  As I am reminded of all that He has already done for me, my heart is flooded with peace.  He has NEVER given me a reason not to trust Him.  I have no reason to worry.  In fact, He commands us over and over again not to worry.  It isn’t merely a suggestion.  Worry is a sin. 

So I pray that my heart will trust fully in my savior.  He has done so much for me.  He has prepared for me a place in Heaven.  This life is short, and soon I will be home with Him.  There is no pain here on earth that heaven cannot fix.  I have no reason to worry.  My God is in control and I trust in Him!

Thanksgiving!

I'm currently listening to the Justin Bieber Christmas CD which goes against my normal rule of no Christmas music before Thanksgiving, but for JB I can make an exception!  Even though I'm already getting in the Christmas spirit, I can't forget about Thanksgiving! With all of the pumpkin bread and pumpkin flavored coffee I have been consuming recently I'm falling in love with Fall.  I look at the trees and all of their bright red, yellow, and orange leaves and amazed at the creativity of my God!  Little Rock is so beautiful in the Fall.  On my drive to work each morning I cross over the Arkansas River and am amazed at all that my God has created.  The beauty of it all amazes me!  I have so much to be thankful for.  In honor of Thanksgiving I would like to share just a few of the things that I am thankful for!

1.  Starbucks Skinny Vanilla lattes!

2.  A good pair of tights!  I really appreciate the person who realized it was a smart idea to cut the feet off of panty hose and make them a little thicker!  

3.  My brother and sister-in-law!  Erin and I love this pic, but I'm sure Braden doesn't feel the same way.  I've been so blessed to have an incredible brother, and I am so thankful that He married one of my best friends in the whole wide world!  They are about to take off for 27 months to El Salvador.  I know that God is going to use them in incredible ways to bless the people they will be working with there!

4.  I am so thankful for my girls!  God has blessed me with some of the most incredible teens in the world.  I love my job!  They have taught me so much!  I love the opportunity to grow in our faith together!

5.  My parents!  I love these 2 people so much!  They have blessed my life in so many amazing ways.  I've been so blessed to grow up in a home where there was always more than enough love to go around.  I still crawl up in my dad's lap on the couch to watch sports whenever I go back to OKC, and I talk to my sweet mother weekly on the phone! They have pointed my eyes towards Christ since day one, and there is no way I could ever repay them for all they have done for me!

6. Casey, Kellie, and Isaac Rine!  I have been really blessed to be able to work with Casey over the past 6 months.  Each day in the office is full of lots of laughs and practical jokes.  Their family has been a blessing to me since I moved to Little Rock 1 1/2 years ago before we ever even worked together.  I'm very blessed to have this family in my life!

7.  My lil sister/best friend!  No one makes me laugh more than my little sister.  She is my absolute best friend in the whole wide world.  I love our random phone calls and our slumber parties that we have every time we are in the same city!  She has the biggest heart in the whole wide world.  She is always looking for ways to make other people feel loved.  I'm so glad that I was blessed with a built in best friend.

8.  The wonderful women at PV who mentor me and cover me in prayers!  Tonya, Linda, Jana, Gwen, and so many more!  God has blessed me with so many incredible women.  If I ever need anything I know that all it takes is one text and I will have some incredible women of faith at my side in no time!  I receive constant texts, emails, and phone calls of encouragement from these women.  I am so blessed to be a part of their lives!

9.  Kristin and Kristen!  Kristin has been right by my side since sr. year of high school and as time goes on we just continue to get closer.  Every time I come back to OKC we make it a priority to see each other and we have frequent phone calls in between my visits to OKC.  She is incredible and I am so thankful for her.  Before I moved to LR I prayed and prayed that God would bring me good friends here.  He is so faithful.  I have a wonderful group of friends here that I am so thankful for, especially Kristen.  He has blessed me with that go to friend who I know will always be there!

10.  The Horns!  The summer I interned in Jonesboro I was blessed to get a second family.  This family is so special to me.  I love my three little siblings and my second set of really young parents!  Since my family is 5 hours away from me it is nice to have the Horns a little bit closer.  I know that if I ever need a weekend away or if something goes wrong that I can be with my second family in less than 2 hours.  I always enjoy going up to Jonesboro to see them and slumber partying with Maggie Beth!  

11. A nice apartment.  I am so thankful for a place to live.  God has blessed me with a comfortable place to sleep.  I love having a place where my girls know they can come and hang out!  I love having them in my home.  I love being able to use my apartment to bless other people.  

12.  Abbey, Beth, and Jenna!  There aren't too many of us girls in youth ministry floating around, but I have been so blessed to have three close friends right there going through the same blessings and struggles.  It's such a blessing to have friends who understand some of the struggles and joys of ministry. These girls are a constant resource and some of my best friends!

13.  The Church!  I am so thankful that God has blessed me with an incredible church family.  I love knowing that I can go almost anywhere and have a family of believers there.  I am blessed so much by being a part of His family.  

14.  The Word!  I have always been thankful for the Bible, but God has really given me a hunger for His Word recently.  I am really starting to learn just how much His Word impacts my life.  It is my constant source of strength and guidance.  His Word fills me with joy and overflows my heart!  

15.  The thing that I am most thankful for is my Jesus.  You could take away all of the other things on this list from my life, and although I would be upset, I would still have a reason to rejoice because my Jesus can never be taken from me.  No matter what this world has in store for me, I know that someday soon my Jesus has something far greater prepared for me.  I am so thankful for the sacrificial love of my father to give up His only son for me.  

I have been blessed beyond belief.  I am so thankful to my awesome God for all the blessings that He has poured out on my life.  I pray that I will turn around and use these blessings to bless others.  To those who have been given much, much will be expected.  After all that my God has given me I know that He expects much from me.  I pray that each breath of my life will be fully 100% dedicated to the glory of His name.  May I never forget that these blessings came from Him and should be used for Him.